This A-24 film bills itself as horror, the most horrific being the abundance of human excrement central to the plot. Somewhere in the script is commentary about race relations, familial obligations, elder care and generational trauma… but it gets sidelined by fecal encrusted bedsheets and urine soaked rugs. The script hints at secret cults and sinister secrets, but the truth all mundane. The actors all give quality performances, Kathryn Hunter deserves acclaim for the quality of her performance and the physical endurance required. However, it does get lost beneath layers of foulness, on metaphorical and literal levels. her character is someone, by design, repugnant, and her decrepit state only exacerbates her worst tendencies. She can also be surprisingly sympathetic and darkly humorous, but throughout the messaging gets muddled. The ending leaves one in a conflicted moral state as the resolution. I suppose it can be argued it is all horrific, and there are definitely some strange beats, but I’m hard-pressed to call this a horror film, and hard to recommend it in most other capacities.
V/H/S - Beyond (2024)
The latest entry in the VHS anthology eschews the focus on a single year and instead brings a genre focus on sci-fi, more specifically with aliens. As always anthology is a mixed bag, but the overall product does feel like one of the weaker entries in the series. There are some standout episodes, your mileage may vary, but Live and let Dive and Stowaway were a step above, and the latter the only segment to actually adhere to the V/H/S aesthetic. One particular segment seems so glaringly out of place and so absurd it actively serves to diminish the entire package. The wraparound segment is particularly weak, with the reveal being rather underwhelming, and in most of the entries the monsters come off more goofy than terrifying. As always, anthology horror is a soft spot for me, and I’ve loved the V/H/S series unreservedly, but the found-footage gimmicks have certainly worn thin and hopefully next year’s entry will provide better quality.
D+
Cuckoo (2024)
This movie is an extraordinarily weird experience, as many of the beats within deal with a reality/perceptual distortion field that can lead to confusion and disorientation. This is certainly intended by the filmmakers, as it contributes to a sense of disjointedness and bewilderment, trying to discern exactly what is going on. What is actually occurring makes sense within the internal logic of the film, but also introduces plot-holes and continuity confusion that might baffle most viewers. The performances are a standout, both Hunter Schafer providing an emotional and engaging lead and Dan Stevens being an absolute hoot as an almost mustache twirling villainous presence.The film requires extreme suspension of disbelief in many of its choices, but also provides some genuinely unsettling and terrifying sequences. This film balances elements of personal drama and sympathetic relatability with the protagonist’s particular trauma with gonzo elements of a wacky creature feature. The last act definitely leans into extreme absurdity, but is fun enough to engage in its hilarity. Overall, an engaging romp at its best when not trying to be overly serious about its deranged subject matter, and a fun showcase for both Schafer and Stevens delivering almost contradictory performances within the same runtime.
C+
Succubus (2024)
Well, that was awful. There are two movies with the same title released this year, and difficult to discern which is the worse experience. Given the title and subject matter, both filmmakers use it as a springboard to display plenty of nudity and gore, I suppose your preference would be whether you like your nudity of the male or female variety. Oh, one’s in Russian, to help distinguish them. The American atrocity tries to sing an incel song of emasculated males, while the Russian entry feels like a 12 year old edgelord first discovering boobs look great on film. Of the two I’d argue the Russian option offers one or two more scares, while the American version leans heavier on the gore. On either front, these films are atrocious and deserving of a simultaneous
F
Azrael (2024)
Samara Weaving is becoming quite a modern horror icon, starring in this dialogue-free experimental film about survivors in a post-rapture world. An initial title card gives a brief explanation of the world and setting, most of the information delivered entirely through show not tell by necessity of the film's gimmick. Most of it works as a taut, survival horror film, with some very gory moments and some unsettling monster designs. Not everything works, and there are a lot of gaps in the narrative the viewer needs to fill in for themselves. There are some baffling elements, including why the filmmakers decided the viewers might need a flashback to something that literally happened minutes ago, and the nature of the demonic influences aren’t very well explained. The film raises far more questions than it answers, but the action and horror elements are well executed, and the filming and cinematography are excellent. The ending again leaves the viewers to decide for themselves what the coda will be, but for its brevity and uniqueness, this film is certainly worth a watch.
C+
The Coffee Table (2024)
The poster bills this as a ‘cruel’ film, and does not lie. By virtue of its subject matter, it is simultaneously the most horrific and realistic horror one might see this year, or most any year. It is a slow train wreck of guilt in the aftermath of a horrible tragedy, and every scene carries an uncomfortable nature. There’s far less gore than one would expect, but it gleefully allows your mind to fill in all the blanks, and there’s nothing pleasant conjured. It also possesses a dark humor, but one would be hard-pressed to laugh during any moment watching it. This is like an endurance test for how much one can take watching personal torment, and gut-wrenching on many levels, far from the inciting event. The closest comparison my mind can find is the ‘Tell-Tale Heart’, or something by the Coen brothers, but without any of the characters being actively horrible people. It is brilliantly made, effectively executed, unique and unflinching in its bleakness. The actors are fantastic in their depiction, but again… This is all very hard to watch and hard to recommend, but for those willing to watch a worst case scenario of personal tragedy, there is nothing else like it on the landscape, with an unrelenting confidence that no hollywood studio would ever touch something like this.
B+
Apartment 7a (2024)
This is like the inverse of the First Omen, a completely unnecessary prequel and a waste of a phenomenal cast. It regurgitates so many beats from Rosemary‘s baby it might as well be a remake. Not one of the ‘good’ remakes, the type of remake that is only a pale shadow of its predecessor. It does have phenomenal production values, and adheres quite closely to aesthetic of the original. But while Rosemary baby remains an undisputed masterpiece, this film seemingly undermines a number of the developments, by rehashing them without the discipline or restraint to build the atmosphere, paranoia or deliver the payoff effectively. Despite the aforementioned performances, this film is ultimately weak and forgettable, with its attempts at horror cringingly without any scare factor, and it is strongly advised simply go, rewatch Rosemary‘s Baby instead of wasting your time here.
D
The First Omen (2024)
Seemingly a sister film to Immaculate, retreading similar ground and hitting a number of nigh-identical beats. However, on almost every level this film excels where the former falters. This has a better story, better execution, better characters and development, better scares and higher production values. This is one of the few legacy prequels I can think of that is actually quite good, not requiring familiarity with the original films, but whose viewing can only be enhanced by such. The filmmakers admirably avoid jump-scares and genre tropes, and deliver a product that is genuinely unsetting. The film is a slow build to the horror elements, but thick with atmosphere and growing tension. The feel and tenor strikingly evokes the tone and resonance of the original Omen film without reliance upon nostalgic callbacks. Instead there are excellent framing, cinematography, sound cues, and an authenticity to the look and feel of the original, where this feels like it could have easily been made in 1976, but more polished. Until things go a little zany in the last act, where the ending might elicit more eye-rolls than scares. But until then, this film was a welcome surprise, providing both disquieting chills and vile grotesqueries in a film that is far better than it should be.
B
Immaculate (2024)
This movie leans very heavily into nunsploitation, and your appreciation of the film will be entirely contingent on how much you admire Sydney Sweeny’s appreciable assets. In the runcount, I would estimate a third of the film features Sweeny in translucent or gossamer attire, with the tantalizing notion that you can almost see her nipples. The rest of the film leans heavily into sexy-nun tropes, but overall the film is decent in execution. The settings are nicely gothic and creepy, there’s plenty of disquieting atmosphere and imagery, and the horror elements provide a lot of expected body-horror and copious gore. There is little here you haven’t seen before, but Sweeny does possess an innate charisma and intensity that anchors the film’s more outlandish notions and developments. Her performance is the standout in what is otherwise a rehash of similar religious horror films, augmented by some gorgeous locales and an effort to have many of the characters speaking italian to augment the main character’s sense of alienation and isolation. Despite this, the story is pretty threadbare, a bit too campy, and would be far more forgettable without Sweeny’s contributions.
C
Out of Darkness (2024)
The stone-age might be one of the most underutilized eras in film, and this goes all-out in its commitment to a level of authenticity. The look is unique with some absolutely fantastic design and production. Filming in the fog-shrouded atmosphere and forests of the Scottish highlands helping with the sense of scale, awe and disquiet. The attention to detail is astounding, from the costuming to the spoken ‘proto-language’ the characters use. The horror elements can be genuinely chilling, especially in the first half of the film. There is a decent amount of gore, and some very tense sequences throughout. The reveal is expected, and does raise some questions on how certain events played out, but overall well handled. The characters are well drawn and defined, even as archetypes, and their wants, needs and desires are empathetic and sympathetic. The struggles they endure are certainly nothing the modern world will ever know, but their motivations resonate quite strongly. The film even goes for a moral commentary about contrasting ideologies and frameworks, telling a very human tale that spans the ages. Overall, a fantastic effort uniquely told, and despite some questionable moments and a bit over-handedness in its coda, this film is certainly worth your watch.
B+
Mind, Body, Spirit (2024)
One of the unending stream of faux-footage films, that tries for a unique setup, and wields great practical trickery, but doesn’t commit to the found-footage format and shackled to an absolutely derivative plot. You know where this film is headed the moment it begins, and despite one or two moments of humor and horror, there’s little soul here. The horror aspects do have some moments, but ludicrously telegraphed and predictable. The best parts of this film are the darkly comedic satire on the wellness influencer industry with an undercurrent commentary on the contradiction between those claiming to aspire towards the spiritual, and the grift, thirst and hustle for clicks, status and success. The lead actress is quite likable, even if her character is burdened with some ludicrously questionable choices in pursuit of ‘her authentic self’. I know a few individuals who, finding a secret creepy occult chamber and musty hand-written grimoire would leap at the opportunity to start reciting the strange passages within, but likely most have seen enough horror to be skeptical. Beyond the setup and performances, there’s little to elevate this film above the rest of its genre trappings, and likely you’ve already seen this film in another variant.
D+
Hellboy: The Crooked Man (2024)
Despite looking like Hellboy by way of Wish or Temu, this film skews far closer to Hellboy comics than previous iterations, with a stronger focus on horrific aspects of this universe. A stripped down budget works in this film’s favor, avoiding bombastic CG extravaganza in favor of more practical effects and a far more grounded tale. The horror itself skews towards old Appalachian folk flavor, and quite a few beats are extremely effective. There’s at least two sequences that could easly be stripped from an Evil Dead film. It is unfortunate this Hellboy skipped theatrical release, as its far better than the last Hellboy outing, even if one still laments never seeing Del Toro complete his Hellboy trilogy. That being said, it is far from a perfect movie, the direction and editing can sometimes baffle, and the story goes all over the place. But if you are a fan of the property, this is as close to the comics as you’re likely to get, and i would gladly watch more films set in this style.
C+
Strange Darling (2024)
Are you a fan of cinema and cinematography? Are you a fan of non-linear storytelling, twists, turns and defiance of expectation? Are you a fan of riveting performances, exquisite direction and efficient and effective screenwriting?
See this movie.
Don’t watch the trailer. Don’t read a synopsis. Don’t look at reviews. See this movie.
A
Subservience (2024)
Megan Fox is a robot. It is the role she was born to play, allowing her to explore the full breadth of her acting capacity. Do you like vacant, blank and sultry? Then look no further! She emotes with the conviction of a toaster in what is a rote and uninspired retread of every bad babysitter trope with a healthy dose of “AI iz takin ur jobs”. Offhand I can think of at least a dozen variants of this concept in 6 different forms of media executed in a vastly superior manner. But those of course don’t have Megan Fox, and I legitimately feel few actresses have the capacity to represent this level of plastic emotiveness, on both physical and emotional levels. But for all the elements of what should be a steamy scifi-thriller, the content feels tame and sanitized, with little to thrill or excite. There are one or two decent visuals, and some surprising gore, but little else to offer. Hilariously, this is not the worst ‘Bad AI’ movie that’s come out this year, that honor belongs to a piece of celluloid atrocity called AfrAId. In comparison, this is a cinematic masterpiece, a mildly entertaining means to waste a few hours, but still deserving of little more than a
D
Longlegs (2024)
Every year there’s one film that gets a ludicrous amount of hyperbolic acclaim. This year’s entry is Longlegs, which… Is pretty good, but certainly not worthy of the hype. The performances leave more of an impression than anything else. Nic Cage goes for ultra-gonzo extremes here with… choices, and Maika Monroe is wonderfully understated. There aren’t many scares, but the entire film is suffused with a thick ominous atmosphere, plenty of moving shadows and blink-and-you’ll-miss creepy moments. The few violent moments are effective and shocking, mostly by how sudden and contrasted they are with the film’s subdued nature. The marketing blitzkrieg for this film arguably has far more to offer than the film itself, with an ultra-detailed backstory and mythology that might intrigue internet completionists. However, little to none of this comes across in the film, which plays like a slow-burn occult crime investigation. Unfortunately, the story is severely wanting, with numerous elements glossed over and others just ignored outright in favor of ginormous stretches in logic and suspension of disbelief. The last act will likely divide filmgoers, as the plot threads and mystery resolution are delivered via enough exposition dump to fill multiple landfills, diminishing the payoff of the film’s slow-burn methodical nature. To reiterate, this is not a bad film, it is wonderfully crafted and edited with a dreamlike surreality that will appeal to fans of Lynch. However, the hype does the film a disservice and sets an expectation for horror this film never meets.
B
Night Swim (2024)
This movie is dumb. But dumb with gusto. It doesn’t pretend not to be dumb. It’s about a haunted swimming pool. It revels in how dumb it is. This was based off a 3 minute youtube short, because, that’s the unfortunate trend with bankrupt creatives, to take something with a nugget of scary, and expand it out unto untold depths. And those depths should have remained untold because, where the three minute short had a visceral intensity and suspense, this lacks anything even remotely resembling it. It is certainly not the worst film ever made, there are a few decent jump scares, some very committed performances, and goes all-out gonzo on the commitment to legitimizing the concept of a haunted swimming pool, but can’t escape its inherent dumbness and the hilarity involved. Doubly hilarious is the creature reveal and the bad CG involved. This certainly qualifies for the camp of ‘its so dumb its fun’ mentality, despite some tedious family drama, but most will find the reality of algae and pool maintenance provide more legitimate terrors than this film offers.