Alien Covenant

F*** you Ridley Scott. 
F*** you for doing your damnedest to destroy your own legacy in creating Alien. 
F*** you for taking the most iconically 'alien' life form ever represented on film, and reducing the Alien to the lab experiment of a pretentious and existentially confused Michael Fassbender. 
F*** you for doubling down on the stupidity that was Prometheus. 
F*** you for forgetting the Space Jockey and treating us to 'Engineers' 
F*** you for taking any interesting potential about the Engineers and ignoring it in favor of aforementioned Michael Fassbender's existential and robosexual confusion. 
F*** you for casting Fassbender, as he's compelling enough an actor to almost make this watchable.
F*** you for deciding the only thing Alien needed was more 'burster' types. Back-Bursters, Throat Bursters... I'm surprised the Ass-Weasels from "Dreamcatcher" didn't make an appearance here.
F*** for basically repeating the exact Alien film formula over and over as you simultaneously tarnish and trash its legacy and future.  
F*** you for still being a talented director visually, because some how that makes all your above sins so much worse. 
F*** you for thinking you have anything left to contribute to this franchise. 
F*** you for your attempts to destroy it. 

F