Absolutely unnecessary and unworthy in execution. The 1984 original or novel are far from sacrosanct, with many elements worthy of an update or reskin but this movie barely tries. Instead it rehashes most of the same beats as the original, expanding and elaborating on the least interesting aspects. Zac Efron seems to be trying his best, but not served very well by the material, and while the new Charlie is not bad, there are few child actors to match the charismatic talent of young Drew Barrymore. Most of the cast feels bored, as will most viewers, as the movie slogs through tedium. The production values are decently budgeted, but there’s not much to be excited about CG fire and a screaming little girl. There are very few frights, but there are some scenes of animal torture that will certainly bother some. The followup ‘lessons’ are mudding and misguided at most generous, and the final act bewildering. Considering the budget, time and talent, this studio farce seems far more egregiously bad than the worst of independent failures and should be an object lesson for all involved. It isn’t just bad as a horror film, of which, it only tangentially qualifies, it’s bad as a movie.
Firestarter (2022)