Ship of the Damned (2024)

Trash.

Cursed undead cannibal pirates sailing a 500 year old ship should at least provide some entertainment, but… No. This film tries to take its cues from The Fog, but you’d be better off watching the Fog remake (2005), which sits at a glorious 3.5 IMDB score. This is bad acting on a cheap set with a sluggish narrative that alternates between flashbacks and the modern day without a decent bridge to connect them. The script is atrocious, no one is expecting high art here, but the writing is unfathomably bad, as are the direction, lighting, and characters. The plot takes some mind-numbingly dumb leaps in logic and plausibility, and the ‘final fight’ is one of the worst choreographed pieces of drek I have witnessed this, or most any year. The stretches in plausibility in this scene alone is matched only by how egregiously this film squandered an awesome piece of poster art. 

F